Help Through Grief

1. Be patient with yourself. Do not compare yourself to others. Go through the mourning process at your own pace.
2. Admit you are hurting and go with the pain.
3. Apply cold or heat to your body, whichever feels best.
4. Ask for and accept help.
5. Talk to others.
6. Face the loss.
7. Stop asking "Why?" and ask "What will I do now?"
8. Recognize that a bad day does not mean that all is lost.
9. Rest.
10. Exercise.
11. Keep to a routine.
12. Introduce pleasant changes into your life.
13. Know that you will survive.
14. Take care of something alive, such as a plant or a pet.
15. Schedule activities to help yourself get through weekends and holidays.
16. Find someone who needs your help.
17. Accept your feelings as part of the normal grief reaction.
18. Postpone major decisions whenever possible.
19. Do something you enjoy doing.
20. Write in a journal.
21. Be around people.
22. Schedule time alone.
23. Do not overdo.
24. Eat regularly.

SYMPTOMS OF GRIEF

PHYSICAL Hyperactive or underactive Feelings of unreality Physical distress such as chest pains, abdominal pains, headaches, nausea Change in appetite Weight change Fatigue Sleeping problems Restlessness Crying and sighing Feelings of emptiness Shortness of breath Tightness in the throat	EMOTIONAL Numbness Sadness Anger Fear Relief Irritability Guilt Loneliness Longing Anxiety Meaninglessness Apathy Vulnerability Abandonment
SOCIAL Overly sensitive Dependent Withdrawn Avoid others Lack of initiative Lack of interest	BEHAVIORAL Forgetfulness Searching for the deceased Slowed thinking Dreams of the deceased Sense the loved one's presence Wandering aimlessly Trying not to talk about loss in order to help others feel comfortable around them Needing to retell the story of the loved one's death

FEELINGS DURING THE PHASES OF GRIEF

IMPACT ( Felt when the knowledge of the death arrives ) Denial Numb Relief Can't Remember EMPTY Shock

RECOIL ( The time when feelings from the shock start coming back ) Anger Fear Panic Disoriented Sick Exhausted

ACCOMMODATION ( Occurs when the mourner realizes that life will go on) There's More Look Ahead It's Up To Me It's OK I'll Make It Healthy Again

HOW GRIEF CHANGES OUR LIVES

EMOTIONALLY Sad Angry Anxious Guilty Lonely Resentful Denial Fear Flash-backs Relief	PHYSICALLY Fatigue Flare-ups of Chronic Conditions Crying Empty Feeling Sleeping Problems Eating Problems
SOCIALLY Fifth Wheel Said No To Invitations Self-Conscious Loss Of Companionship Avoid Places Make New Friends	BEHAVIORALLY Withdrawn Kept Busy Stayed In Bed New skills Lost Life-Style Have To Care For Self Restless